Category: Wellness

Hygge Lifestyle

Published on by Elaina M. Avalos1 Comment

📷: Photo by Alena Zadorozhnaya

Hygge is my favorite concept. I am working at a more hygge lifestyle. If you haven’t heard of it, the basics are:

*It’s a Danish idea and word. It’s tough to say. It is pronounced as “hooga”.
*Hygge is a cozy quality that makes a person feel content and comfortable.
*From the Danes themselves, they define hygge as being “about taking time away from the daily rush to be together with people you care about – or even by yourself – to relax and enjoy life’s quieter pleasures.”

There could be many ways to define hygge for you. While there does tend to be some concepts that seem to be shared with those of us who are working toward a more hygge lifestyle, it can also be a very personal idea. There are those who might feel as though spooky Halloween movies are hygge. There are others who might find that is not hygge in the least. What is comforting, relaxing, and helps you “enjoy life’s quieter pleasures” may not be the same for someone else.

I am working at cultivating a more hygge lifestyle. Some of the ways I am working on that include:

  1. Decorating with softer light and adding “fairy lights” or white string lights, that are used throughout the year (not just during the holiday season).
  2. When searching for something to watch or listen to, more often than not, I’m gravitating toward television shows, podcasts, movies, etc., that create that feeling (or remind me of it). An example of a super hygge movie for me is You’ve Got Mail. When I need a break from the world, I am re-watching Newhart on Amazon Prime.
  3. Fresh flowers, plants, and thoughtful displays of beautiful things (beautiful to me) in my home. This one is interesting because Danish homes may have a more minimalistic aesthetic. I am not minimalistic in the least. But I still think what I love to have around me is hygge.
  4. Working at remembering the delight and joy around me.
  5. Letting lovely *art like this one, below . . . inspire me and remind me of the kind of lovely environment I want to be in and around.

This is a short list and not definitive. But I wanted to share a few examples as I work toward resetting my clock – back to a time in my life where living a hygge lifestyle was my life more than it wasn’t.

Have you heard of hygge and if so, what are some ways you try to practice a hygge lifestyle?

*I don’t know who created this art. I’ve done a reverse image search and can’t seem to find the origin. I originally found it, here. More than happy to give credit to the artist if I find them.

Grief is Really Just Love

Published on by Elaina M. Avalos1 Comment
Grief Jamie Anderson, grief is really just love, elaina avalos

“Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love. It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot. All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest. Grief is just love with no place to go.”
― Jamie Anderson

Today, for the first time since my brother and father passed away, I went to a new doctor. I’m establishing primary care in my new city and I had to answer all of the questions and fill out family history (twice). The wording on this questionnaire hurt my heart and I had to fight back the tears. On this form, it asked for my sibling’s info as well as my parent’s. It asked about their medical history. Checking those boxes was traumatic in a way I didn’t expect. It was harder for my brother – as it always is. My dad was unhealthy for a very long time with multiple hospital stays over recent years. My brother was seemingly healthy and getting healthier all the time. Or so we thought. He was also my younger brother. One never, ever expects to say goodbye to their youngest (and only) sibling.
It has been tough this afternoon and evening to distract myself from the loneliness of facing the death of your only sibling. I will miss him always.

For someone that had one primary dream her entire life (to have a family) – facing the loss of family is deeply painful. We don’t ever fully get over these losses. I believe that completely. I believe the loss changes shape over time, however. Our grief is really just love . . . and because of that, we’re gonna hurt, we’re gonna laugh at the funny memories, and we’re gonna naturally long that it wasn’t a pain we had to know it the first place.

I will always love and miss my brother – he was my only sibling. But grief – while hard to navigate, is also a reminder of how much he was loved, too.

Stay Close to People Who Feel Like Sunshine

Published on by Elaina M. AvalosLeave a comment
stay close to people who feel like sunshine, elaina avalos

It’s been gloomy here on the coast of the Carolinas. I can endure cold, bad weather, and I don’t hate snow or ice. But when it’s dark and you can’t see the sun for days on end, I get a little cranky and uncomfortable. Today, after multiple days of fog, rain, and misty spitting rain (consistently ruining my new haircut) – the sun finally visited. Tonight, it will be 22 and breezy. Tomorrow it will be around 43 & windy – chilly for the coast, for sure. But the sun will be shining and that’s all I care about at this point.

I grew up in Southern California where I’ve jokingly said all of my adult life that we don’t have “weather.” I mean, they don’t really. It’s sunny most of the time and rain is infrequent (except for lately). I love that I now get to live in a place with real weather. But none of this is really the point of my post.

Stay close to people who feel like sunshine.

Have you heard the quote – stay close to people who feel like sunshine? I was thinking about it today as the sun finally made its appearance through the clouds. The joy that fills my heart when I’m around people like this is . . . unmatched. I just want more and more of it. I can’t get enough of it. I can’t get enough of them. This is what it’s like when you find your match – in friendship or in love. They’re like a ray of sunshine that warms you from the inside out – even when it’s cold outside. Even when life is hard and weird and nothing makes sense and you can’t imagine how things will line up and come together, you just want more.

I just want more. Stay close.