She Walked Alone

six word bio, elaina avalos, elaina m. avalos

Recently, I came across a writer’s Facebook post. She’d shared (here) a post from a professor who wanted students to come up with a six word bio to describe themselves. The professor went first. The bio was, “That beautiful stranger loved me once.” So intriguing. If that was a tag line for a novel, I’d probably buy it.

But I’ve wondered what my six word bio would be. I’ve come up with a few – like the one above. I love with my whole heart. That has always been true. It will always be true.

I had another one that I almost went with. It was, “She walked alone, it’s grown old.” But then I thought maybe that was a little depressing. Depressing but true, so here I am sharing. As modern women, I’m pretty sure we’re supposed to reflect something different – something less emotional and more bullet proof. Right? We’re supposed to live our lives not needing a man for anything. Isn’t that the message?

It’s a whole lot of BS. The truth is, I’ve been alone for long enough. I don’t need to pretend. It’s not a weakness to need community, companionship, love, affection, and to live your life with someone else. I haven’t once and will not ever wait around to pursue what I want. My weekend was characterized by rest, trying to work myself back into an exercise routine, writing, a little cleaning, and today – I cooked all afternoon (which I love to do). In other words, I do my thing and I refuse to be miserable because life isn’t exactly what I envisioned.

It’s not as though I don’t make the most of each moment. I’m working so very hard on that very thing. I wasted too much time in the past. Nonetheless, it has still grown far too old – walking this path alone. I will forever live in each moment, wherever it takes me. I’d just like to do it alongside my best friend and partner. Tell me I’m not the only one. So yeah, I love with my whole heart and walking alone has grown old. Granted, the heartache and alone-ness gave me some good writing fodder. But I have a great imagination so I’d be good with less of that now. 🙂

I’m looking forward to the next adventure (that I hope is around the corner). I hope I’ll be on that adventure with my true companion.

What would your six-word bio be?

Author * Dream Chaser

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That’s me. I’m an author. I’m a dream chaser. There are some nay-sayers out there that wonder about all this “dream” talk. I get it.

I really do.

But let’s look at this another way. What if your dream was better defined as that thing that makes you, you? What if your dreams are perfect visions of what you were made to do and be?

I believe our “dreams” are part of our calling, or that mark we’re meant to leave on our world. Maybe our world is within the walls of our own home? Maybe it’s something we have to contribute that could literally change our world or make a positive impact on society in a major way? Maybe it’s the way we are called to support others, from behind the scenes?

I don’t know what your dream is or what that calling is. But I do know that you are here for a reason and have something that only you can bring to the world.

So what is it for you? What dream should you be chasing? What dream have you let lie dormant for far too long?

I’ve been chasing dreams for a long time. In fact, I recently realized that my dream chasing goes much further back than the most obvious things I think of {foster care & writing} when I think about chasing dreams.

One thing I’ve learned, as I’ve chased hard, is that the your reasons to quit can sometimes be greater than your reasons to keep pushing. This is a fact. But you’ve got to keep pushing & fighting your way through. Opposition to the dream doesn’t indicate a darn thing.

People of faith are often uncomfortable with this, believing that “closed doors” indicate that it’s time to end the pursuit of . . . whatever it is.

But this is faulty thinking. Maybe it’s our “first-world” issues in America that make us give up so easily – as if everything should be handed to us on a golden platter.

What I know? Sometimes the most beautiful gifts in my life have come after the toughest climb. Sometimes opposition actually means you’re in exactly the right place. Some of you are there right now.

In a way, I’m kind of there too. There’s a lot of reasons I can’t or shouldn’t. But I’m going for it anyway.

I don’t know what your dream is, but I’m here cheering you on. I’m cheering you on, while I chase mine.

Tell me about your dreams {if you feel a need to “speak” this dream aloud}.

 

 

 

Advice from Oprah on Trying & Failure

Oprah, Oprah Winfrey, dreams, leap of faith, trying, failure

A few years ago, I ran into the image below on Pinterest. I immediately added it as a profile photo on Facebook. I could not even help myself. It’s adorable but also a reminder for us dreamer types. To keep pressing forward, we have to believe in our abilities and in the rightness of the journey (see what I did there), in the first place.

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I jumped into the fire in June, by becoming an indie author. My first novel is called Chasing Hope. I’m not sure I was ready. But knowing how I am, I’m so glad I jumped when I did. I’m not sure time would have better prepared me. It’s far more likely that I would have found a multitude of reasons why I shouldn’t publish my novel.

Now that I’m a month into this process, I am not selling as many books as I would like. There’s a temptation to let that discourage me. I certainly felt that a few times this weekend. But this is just a distraction from the main point . . .

I took a leap of faith. Now is not exactly the time to stop believing.

Duh.

Like with anything, when you take a big risk, or at least what feels like a big risk, you hope to see some reward. That’s a no-brainer.

Do the one thing you think you cannot do. Fail at it. Try again. Do better the second time. The only people who never tumble are those who never mount the high wire. This is your moment. Own it. – Oprah Winfrey

But some of our reward comes from choosing to step out in faith in the first place and then not giving up. No, really. If you’re not trying, of course you’re not failing. If you’re not trying, you’re never going to accomplish those big dreams of yours.

But taking those steps of faith, whatever they are, are part of the joy of the process. It’s thrilling (really) to do something you’ve dreamed about for decades. It’s actually thrilling.

The thing is, I might fail at this.

There are moments that I care about that. But most of the time, I’m just so excited that I’ve become more focused on finding my way to success. Keep in mind that whatever it is that you’re aiming for, jumping into the fire is not just your first step to success.

It’s actually your first reward along the way, too. Not everyone takes these leaps of faith. Many like to talk, dream, or think about it and yet, they remain fixed and focused on the potential for failure. Their focus on the potential for failure keeps them mired in the same spot.

But, I can tell you that the joy (mixed with a little fear and trembling) that comes from stepping right smack dab into a dream, is the best feeling ever. It has taken me long enough. I hope you will jump in, too.

Feel like jumping into the fire, with me? What’s your big dream?