A Love I Deserve

r.h. Sin, elaina avalos, you deserve the love you give, elaina m. avalos

There’s this thing I’ve been waiting for – this love I’ve been waiting for. There is a love I deserve. It’s a burn it all down, kind of love. It’s a drive to your house, stand on your doorstep and knock until you open the door, kind of love and passion. It’s a love that doesn’t choose me last, of all the things to choose. I mean, maybe I’m not first – but I certainly can’t settle for last. It’s the love that is free from constraints and stands upon the threshold of my life and says, “I needed to see you as soon as I could.”

This is what I want. It’s what I deserve.

It can be a slow burn. It can even take work to get there. But it’s the love that chooses me and stops at nothing to keep me around when faced with my absence. It’s the love that refuses to back down. It’s the love that doesn’t walk away. I want and deserve a love that protects me. You keep me safe, I’ll keep you wild. I want and deserve someone who is vulnerable with me and doesn’t run from living life together as partners in the good, bad, and the grey in-between- where life doesn’t always make sense.

This is what I want. It’s what I deserve.

It’s not all about me. But I already know what I bring to the table. And with a sliver of hope, I wait.

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